I need to be more confident on myself.

Where is my confident?? I can't see any confident on myself. I speak loud but actually there is no confident in me. I really feel useless.
My English is not good and i know it too. I tell myself a lot of time that I need to improve myself but why I'm still the same? I need improvement seriously but how?? When i speak English I surely will mess up the words that I use.
I must be more daring in doing something. Why do I always feel scare when doing something? Everyone need to learn, need to fall down, only they will know what they suppose to do in their life, no matter love, money, career. Everything need to learn. Like what my best friend told me, Everything need to learn before you know what to do.

So for now, I need to learn what to do, learn how to speak more English nicely. I don't want to let myself drop down until cannot stand up. I don't want to disgrace my parent. Don't want them to feel worry and sad about me anymore. I'm a big girl already . I should know what to do not asking people what should I do. This is what our life suppose to be.

From now onward, I will learn every step of my life again. I will be more confident on myself. I must believe that, when I failed, I will stand up and redo it over and over again until i passed.

Thanks to all the people that give me advice, teach me how to be better in life. I really do appreciate it. thanks.